Kitsu

God damn, it has been a while.

And guess what got me writing here again...? PROCRASTINATION. It is exam week, and I have to finish putting together a giant mother fucking terror of a portfolio/binder/thing for fashion class, and I don't want to do it. Surprise!

Reread Sunshine. Is it sad that in my dreams I get to produce/shoot/script/etc Sunshine and turn into a two-part movie of EPIC and WIN? Because I feel like if any big studio got ahold of it would probably go straight to hell, and I'm pretencious enough to think I could do it right, thank you very much. Oooooh, and everything cold be color edited in dark staturated greens and blues and blacks for the vampire scenes, and Sunshine and Yolade's house would be filled with not only windows but abient light to make it brighter, and I could turn the white up... I want to do it SO BAD. <3

But um. This semester was rough, but was also pretty sweet. French was hell put in a basket that tried, desperately, to escape and eat my brains with it's Cuthulu-esc tenticles. BUT. It's over now! Idk how I'm going to pass three more semesters of a foreign lang, but that's beside the point! 8D

There are a lot of kids on campus I don't see anymore, and it makes me really, really sad. It doesn't help that the reason is that they moved to a different school (*coughEMILYcough*). Ah, well.

( Don't Look, I'm Goin' All Gushie and Reminicent and Shit. )

Taken all of my exams but fashion history. Wee.

I AM ALSO GOING TO PARIS IN A WEEK. OMFG PARRRIIISSSS. AND THEN LONDON. I <3 CHRISTMAS.

I intend to take a ridiculous number of pictures. And am considering buying another camera, because I am crazy. I dunno, though - both are rather expensive, and I have no source of income atm. Either way. I am SO PSYCHED. Yesyes. I may even post pictures on here, if I remember to!

1) I am! I'm back! It's exciting!

2) I'm in a dorm at the bottom of the worst hill ever (not really, but at the end of the day it can occasionally be a bitch - but hey, leg muscles!), but the room is lovely and my roomie and suitemates are brilliant, so all is well. I lucked out.

3) My classes, so far, look to be mostly good, but some are going to be seriously intense (*cough*fashionhistory*cough*). I am going to be running around like a headless chicken for most of this semester.

4) However, I am in love with most of my professors so far, or at the very least am endlessly amused by how quirky they are. I have one professor, for example, who lectures to the door as opposed to the class. I also have another who sounds as if he is trying to imitate John Rhys-Davies, but is only partially succeding. Besides talking in a very silly, booming sort of voice, he will, apparently at random, over-emphasize words, drawing them out so that it takes twice as long to say them as it should. He also never showed up to teach class the first day, but that is neither here nor there. XD

5) Clubs also are starting/have started. Yay! <3

6) Before school started, I didn't get to hang out with everyone I had intended too. I send my deepest apologies to those whom I might have, completely unintentinally, slighted. ( biosage_x , I am so sorry. I was a complete ass-hat. >.< )

7) I am curently re-reading Snowcrash, and trying to get as excited about it as when I first read it. It's not really working.

8) I love having short hair, but it can suck in the sticky summr heat.

But no I run away to go do homework - loves to you all!

I think I am in love. Or vaguely horrified. But mostly just in love. I think it's the excessive pockets that really do it for me.

(10:22:19 PM) modernselkie: I say tampons should not be dry fucking wads of cotton.
(10:22:39 PM) modernselkie: like, something nice should go there.
(10:23:22 PM) Joanna: I was going to say like chocolate, but then I realized I was retarded
(10:23:43 PM) modernselkie: AHAHAHAHA
(10:23:58 PM) Joanna: I want a cashmiere tampon
(10:24:07 PM) modernselkie: I can see the advertisements now - Blood and Chocolate. anyone?
(10:24:10 PM) Joanna: -writes a letter ot Always-
(10:24:11 PM) Joanna: HAHAHA
(10:24:18 PM) Joanna: YES BRILLIANT
(10:24:35 PM) modernselkie: I want something sleek.
(10:24:45 PM) Joanna: like, a dolphin??
(10:24:55 PM) modernselkie: Liike... is it sad that the first thing that came to mind when I said sleek was google/
(10:24:56 PM) modernselkie: ?
(10:25:04 PM) modernselkie: Or, you know
(10:25:05 PM) Joanna: no
(10:25:07 PM) Joanna: it's retarded
(10:25:11 PM) modernselkie: a tampon made by apple.
(10:26:14 PM) Joanna: omg write a letttterrr
(10:26:21 PM) modernselkie: XD
(10:26:26 PM) modernselkie: BEST LETTER EVER.

I should be working on one of the multitude of papers I have due in the next three weeks. I really should. But I just got violently ill, AGAIN, for, like, the third time in as many days, and so think maybe a break would be in order. (What the fuck, stomach, I'm not a senior in high school anymore. Stop giving me this shit again.) I am, haha, sick of being sick. I can't afford to miss class at this point, damn it all. >_>;

I feel happy right now, happier than I've been in a while. I have a test in, like, ten minutes, but hopefully it'll go well. When I get out I plan to chill by myself for a bit, and revel in the happy.This will probably result in naps. I am so tired.

I think this is a bitchin' plan.

PS: Finding out what people think about you is weird.

Guess what, guys. Working up the nerve to talk about them is difficult shit, but it is worth it.

(Generally.)

PS: Why am I not sleepy? o_O

Guess what guys; there is SNOW. To be precise, there is four inches of snow! By my standard, that is a lot of snow. (My standard: any snow is a lot of snow.) I like snow. Love snow. Missed snow. Am happy there is snow. Omg snoooow. <3

Um. Lets see. It's spring break, which makes the snow rather ironic. But I'm not complaining. Though it means my mother is pulling her whole, "YOU'RE STILL MAH BABEH GIRRRLLL"  and not letting me drive anywhere when there is snow so much as even mentioned in the forecast. I love home, but there are things about it I don't miss. Regardless! It is beautiful outside, and I do love being home. Cats, for one thing. I missed my fuzzies. <3 Food, and movie nights with actual TVs! Conversations and catching up with parental units! Seeing friends from home! Making bad jokes with Papa! Cooking things! HAVING A KITCHEN THAT HAS THINGS IN IT. It's fun times.

So far break has been pretty chill. Again, hanging out with old HS friends - Samie had her woodbridge birthday party, and we partied into the early hours, and shot off fireworks in the snow. Or, well, tried. Then TJ's house, where he has TWO ADORABLE AND TINY KITTENS. Then shopping, and hanging out with Damian, and midnight walks in the snow. Movie watching too. And Elaine hangings out (papa came home and was like, "ELAINE WAS HERE." Me: "How can you tell?" Papa: "Your hair is in braids. When else is it in braids?") and Tom is theoretically coming over tonight. SOCIAL LIFE, YOU ARE SORT OF HAPPENING.

Other than that, I've been sleeping and making lots of tea.

And, um. That's my life, I guess. Cheers!

I'm never going to understand people. This is ok, I guess. I don't really mind. But people do things that make no sense to me, people I've known for ages, as well as people I've only just met. Sometimes I feel like the people I am only acquainted with are more easily understood than my friends. This is probably only because I don't know them well enough to see their quirks, though. XD

So! Goals for this week - beginning to figure out my beliefs. My old beliefs aren't necessarily working for me, and it's time to open my mind a bit. I want to figure out how things work in my head, and what will make me happy. Funny how that can be really difficult sometimes, huh? I did a few rounds of ETF a la gala to make myself cheer up. I'd forgotten how very silly, but in the end, happy, tapping makes me. Yay stress relief!

What's up with you?

<3 Baking  - yesterday, Emily and I invaded the house of Meg and Johnny to take over  their kitchen and haphazardly bake cakes and brownies and cookies. It was amazingly fun - the place smelled wonderful because of the baking, Meg was in a state of blissed out delirium and was therefore hysterically funny, Johnny was doing his usual sarcastic but awesome thing, and we babbled tabletop RPGs, the awkward times of dating people, comics, and the joys of tongues. XD

<3 Walks - I like wandering around at night, and taking walks in the dark at, oh, 1:00 or 3:00 am is amazing times. The stars look wonderful, and the campus is almost empty (assuming no one is having a fire drill XD ). It's really peaceful. One of my favorite things is to be in a place that reminds me strongly of people, but for there not to be any people there. A take on the traditional "abandoned buildings are awesome" train of thought, I guess.

<3 Photography - Best therapy ever. I love it. Enough said.

<3 Stories - staying up really late, until both people are all but delirious, and just talking about anything? It's wonderful. You find out some really funny nonsense about people, and even the stupidest jokes are funny, and you can just sort of peacefully space out, and everything is smiley and wonderful.

<3 Wall Posts - Delightful people leaving me cute messages makes me squee!

<3 Suspender Belts & Stockings - I don't think this one needs a description.

<3 Corsets - I bought a new corset at Katsu this year, and omfg, it is true true love. It's maroon and gold, underbust, and one of my favorite things ever. It's so pretty, I kind of just want to pet it.

Honorable Mentions - watching people get flustered because of things you said; red velvet cupcakes!; Meg Puddles!; Spiffy coming to visit me today~!; singing along to songs instead of working (oops); scheming; pretending to work; teasing friends about their choice in videogames; daydreaming about old times; planning epic visits and trips to do this summer, already!; my new super cute flower power hat!; dreams about bright lights and stars and swirling colors; winks and nudges and head scratches; crossing things off my to-do list; beautiful weather and hugs from people I love.

February TilT
<3 Plans coming to fruition. Katsucon, anyone?
<3 Movie nights and study parties with wonderful people.
<3 Working things out with people; by which I mean, not fighting with friends. XD
<3 The absolutely beautiful weather of late. I go outside and can't stop smiling.
<3 Getting my computer back from the dead! Thank all the Gods, I was going into terrible withdrawal. XD
<3 New music from friends. I lost a rather significant portion of my music in my computer issues of late, so Tom has slowly but surely been giving me music to make up for it. Currently, I've been listening to ZOX and Black Rebel Motorcycle Club; make me happy, in their silly emo-ness.
<3 Elaine's wicked awesome sewing skillz, makin' me a cape for my Yuffie Costume so I don't freeze. Yay very late Christmas presents. XD
<3 Realizing I don't have to decide anything if I'm not ready to; stasis, right now, is better for me. Just close my eyes, smile, and try my damnedest to be friends with everyone. Shit can't get to me if I don't let it.
<3 Shortbread and Jam cookies.
<3 Planning midnight drives to nowhere just to stare at the stars.
<3 Taking pictures as a form of therapy.

Honorable Mentions: MissMosh (oh my god I love this girl); dreams that for absolutely no reason contain awesome fashion designers, like, say, Karl Lagerfeld and Alexander McQueen (we got coffee on the ceiling of Hyperion, I think; it was very Alice in Wonderland); good food, specifically, good soup; random phone calls at strange hours from friends I haven't talked to in ages; WIND; white pomegranate tea; the sound of the wind through the trees (is it just me, or does it sound like the sea?); the fact that there might be a cute girl buying me cupcakes this weekend!; REUNIONS  <3 (JOANNA AND SPIFFY ILY), trying to become organized and sort of succeeding; realizing that I CAN get everything done on time!; meeting new people (randomly struck up a conversation with some girl who was a friend of a friend, and we found out we have the same name, our birthdays are like, three days off, and we apparently know a lot of the same people. SO WEIRD. But cool. XD); on a similar note, realizing that the world is the size of a fingernail.

Now, all I need to do is start writing again, and maybe I'll be able to chill out, sit back and relax.

So, guess what, guys! If ever there is an invasion of evil robots or something; think, say, a technological apocalypse, in which the only way to save humanity is to destroy the evil things? Never fear! All of your prayers have been answered! Yes, you heard right, I'm telling you you needn't fear the Robotic invasion. And I do not sayt such a thing lightly. Want to know why? Because I would be the child that would stop the Terminators. I'd stand there and smile and they'd frizz into little tiny spark plugs that couldn't harm a fly. Fuck yes.

Do any of you remember when I used to whine and complain about how technology hated my basement, how computers would break when I went to used them because of the weird vibes down there or something? Wrong! It wasn't the basement, it was ME.

My shiny new computer of, oh, a week and a half?

Boom. It blue screened.

Damn it.

Omg. So, um. I'm very happy right now, if vaguely delirious from lack of sleep. These next couple days are going to be reeeaally interesting.

<3

PS: I have the omnibus of Frank Miller's Batman and Robin: Boy Wonder at school now, and am currently rereading it before I trade it for Hush, and could NOT be happier. It's so gloriously silly.

Things I Love Thursday:

- Chocolate flavored coffee in the morning
- leather gloves that go past my elbows <3
- the smell of litchi gummies
- talking with amazing people for hours about geeky, geeky things
- my new butterfly earrings Emily gave me for Christmas <3
- gossiping about professors and comparing them to Harry Potter characters
- making up creatures with suction cup feet
- planning a new world order with Johnny
- EPIC SWORD FIGHTS
- the death of white space

Honorable Mentions: falling madly in love all over again with my Asian Civ professor (I want to marry heeerrrr in the most platonic way possible); breath fogging in the air; getting jumped by random people I haven't seen in a while; love; planning to move to foreign countries with Hunter; getting complimented on my hair (I'm vaaaiiinnn);  BtVS movie nights; dancing in my seat before class because I am just SO EXCITED; heaters that actually work; eating mashed potatoes three days in a row; being told I'm an interesting person to meet; inheriting TVs; arguing the finer points of time travel over hot chocolate; being smiled at; plots with various people that will make Katsucon crazy (XD); pretty leather boots; XKCD; having face making contests; listening to silly stories about people I don't know; trying to work out the craziness of the fencing dating system; getting songs stuck in peoples head; hot, hot, hot showers; pretty posters; planning; history classes of sexy and win.

Have you ever walked into the shower with your socks still on?

Oh, the joys of being back at school.

Interested in reading about my own personal plane? I KNOW you're just sitting on the end of your seat.

In all seriousness, this is being posted for my own personal records, as a journal thing as opposed to just a document in Word. But, I mean, if you really want to? Click the link and get flooded by an onslaught of text. It's fun times. You'll get to see my subconscious and everything, sexy beast that it is. Can't beat that kind of offer.
 

( Shamanistic Journey Pt. I )

 

So! I realized that my last couple posts have been, all told, rather depressing, so I decided to try and fix this by procrastinating on studying and talking about the JOYS OF MY LIFE.

I would do a TilT, but, alas, it is not Thursday quite yet, so Things I Love Thursday doesn't quite apply. And also, Thursday is going to be hell on wheels, brandishing a cane, shouting profane versions of, "STUPID KID GET OFF MY LAWN". But much less amusing. So um. A TilT will, like it as not, not be happening.

But yes! Happy, cheerful things!

1) getting money for text books for classes I hate. It's very, very nice, in this perverse, childish way. I love it.

2) Realizing that studying for something DID help me on that test. Yay, hard work! Shock! Joy! Rapture!

3) I'm movin' out. *starts playing Billy Joel Music*

4) Fweennndddsss. D'aww.

5) This song, because, yes, I am endlessly lame - The Gurren Lagan Opening Song. I also am madly, madly in love with Sibelius and Gershwin again. I would say my poor roommate, but... you know. xD

6) I MIGHT be leaving on Thursday. I dunno for sure, as, apparently, my father is not sure if we can move everything in the time we'd have available on Thursday, but if nothing else, I'll be DONE by Thursday. That, in and of itself, is amazing and sexy and win. <3

7) John Donne has, yet again, found his slinky little way into my heart. Swear to god, I am such a fangirl, it's horrible.

8) According to Amanda Palmer's  webcast, if I asked politely for a kiss at her show and seemed both cute and not likely to bite her head off, she'd oblige. I would... omg. It would make me so endlessly happy. Not particularly in a sexual crush kind of way, but like in medieval times when a lady would give a token to her knight when he was going to joust or to battle. It would give me... spiritual strength. Something. I would be very happy. (And to anyone that saw the webcast - was it just me, or did she look particularly amazing, not just her usual cooky-I-wash-my-hair-only-with-hot-water-but-still-remain-cool self?)

9) Most of my Christmas shopping is done. HELLZ YEAH.

And now studying. Ewww.

1. I hate group projects.

2. Is it sad that I am desperately looking forward to seeing the end of Gurren Lagan this Wednesday? Its a Meca, a MECA for Christ's sake! But oh my God, how do I love it. Viral, I love you. <3

3. The second Kushiel Book is fabulous. I want, so hard, to visit the world the authoress has created. Terre de Ange is beautiful, and the idea that you have a religion based around the consept of, "Love as Thou Wilt" is wonderful to me. Servants of Nammah? Fucking brilliant. This series will soon rank in my list of glorious reads - well written politics, sex, and intrigue, oh my! <3

4. When my roommate first walked into the room after break, she said, "So, when are you moving out?" Didn't even say hello, just straight into the "I want you out of my room". Frustrating, that.

5. Finals, oh how stressful you are. They make eating feel like I am trying to force small cylindrical and circular objects down my throat, the food equivalents of coins and buttons and the flat end of screws. Nomnomnom.

6. Advent calanders scare me. All the little characters are always so jolly and fat - Are they trying to tell us something? They say that you are what they eat: Are these, in fact, tiny creatures that ate a lot of chocolate, got fat, then continued to eat so much that they actually turned into chocolate themselves, frozen forever like edible Carbonite Han Solos? It's really quite dark. It makes me feel rather depressed, this nomming of small frozen chocolate men. Like, haha, I'm eating the food eqivalent of coins and buttons and the flat ends of screws.

7. Thanksgiving break, where did you go? And why do I feel like I got NOTHING done during my time with you, even though I most assuredly did? Winter break, I hope you last longer than Thanksgiving break. Thanksgiving break was a laugh at best.

I cannot type.

But hell, I have something to smile about, nothing much to complain about there. 

<3